Divorce is one of the hardest things to go through in life. There are so many things to consider, such as who will keep the house and how finances should be divided. If you have children, how will custody and visitation be worked out? One of the more awkward things that will need to be done is letting other people know about the situation. But what should you say and when? The professionals from Divorce Options San Diego, the experts in divorce mediation San Diego couples rely on for alternatives to contentious and costly divorce proceedings, offer the following advice about how to tell people you’re getting a divorce.
Time It Right
Don’t say anything until you’re sure you’re heading for divorce. If you’re merely considering it, keep quiet while you and your spouse decide where your marriage stands to keep others from trying to interfere and influence your decision. Once you’re sure, then it’s time to speak up.
Present a United Front
Some divorces are very acrimonious, and in those cases, it may be best for spouses to keep as much distance between them as is reasonably possible. But if you and your spouse are on civil terms, it can be helpful to let close family members and mutual friends know of your decision together so they don’t feel like they have to choose sides or get in the middle.
Give as Few Details as Possible
While it can be tempting to dish the dirt on your spouse and complain about what led to the demise of your marriage, refrain from this as much as possible. The world doesn’t need to know the details of your marriage—or your divorce. Keep explanations short and simple, and although it may be difficult, try your best to avoid insulting or speaking badly of your spouse.
Use Caution When Posting on Social Media
Social media can actually be a good place to announce a divorce, as you can let many people know at once without the need to have the same conversation over and over. However, it’s important to make sure people close to you know first. Your best friend or mother-in-law shouldn’t hear about your divorce for the first time from a social media post. On social media, as in real life, use caution with your words. Be as kind as possible, and avoid giving too many details or talking badly about the other party.
Keep the Announcement Simple
When in doubt, keep it simple and general. It didn’t work out, you grew in different directions, there were irreconcilable differences, you realized you wanted different things in life—these are all perfectly acceptable answers to the question “Why are you getting divorced?”
Choose the Locations of Your Discussions Carefully
When possible, tell people about your divorce in private, especially if you think the conversation may become emotional. Invite people who are close to you over for lunch or coffee. These may be difficult conversations, not just for you but also for the people close to you.
Divorce is never easy, so knowing how to prepare yourself and other people for it can help a great deal as you go through the process. Another great way to approach divorce is to work with experienced divorce mediators. San Diego couples get tremendous benefits from the expertise of the team at Divorce Options San Diego. With backgrounds in law, finance, conflict resolution, and psychology, we work closely with couples, helping them end their marriages with respect and mutual satisfaction so they can move on to the next stages of their lives. To learn more about our groundbreaking divorce mediation process, give us a call today at 858-281-2628.